Not "you're great." Something real.
What did your partner do this week that you noticed?
A small thing counts — maybe more than the big ones.
Gottman's research on couples found that bids for connection — small moments of appreciation, acknowledgement, and noticing — are the foundation of lasting intimacy. Vague appreciation ("you're amazing") has less impact than specific observation ("I noticed you did X, and it made me feel Y"). This exercise trains that specificity.