You've Been Talking Around It Long Enough

Marriage counselling — in-person in Gurgaon and online across India

Why couples come — and when

Most couples don't come to counselling at the first sign of trouble. They try to fix it themselves. They have the same argument again. They give it time. They bring up the topic, it doesn't go anywhere, they drop it. They get busy. Months pass. Then years.

Research by Dr. John Gottman's institute found that the average couple waits six years after problems begin before seeking help. By that point, the patterns are deeply grooved — the contempt that's crept in, the withdrawal, the conversations that start reasonably and end in tears or silence. Six years of that is hard to undo. But it can be done.

The couples I work with most effectively are the ones who come before it's all broken. Who still have goodwill, still want to understand each other, still believe it's possible to get somewhere different. Coming early isn't a sign of weakness — it's the most efficient thing you can do for your marriage.

That said — late is still better than never. If you've been here a long time, you can still move.

What marriage counselling actually does

A different kind of conversation

Sessions aren't a debate where one person wins. They're structured so both people can be heard — often for the first time. That shift alone changes things.

Understanding the real argument

Most couples fight about the surface — the dishes, the in-laws, the money — when the real issues are underneath: feeling unseen, unheard, unsafe. Counselling helps you reach those and address them directly.

Tools that work between sessions

You'll leave with actual frameworks for difficult conversations — not just insights you can't use. How to raise hard things without it escalating. How to repair after a rupture. How to stop a spiral before it takes hold.

What Ruchi works with

Marriage counselling covers a wide range. You don't need to be in crisis to come.

Communication breakdown Constant arguments Emotional distance Infidelity & affair recovery Intimacy & sex Trust issues In-law conflict Parenting disagreements Financial conflict Growing apart Pre-marital counselling NRI long-distance marriage Separation & divorce support

What to expect

1

First session — both stories, without taking sides

Ruchi meets with both of you together. Each partner shares how they're experiencing the relationship, what's not working, and what they want. Her role isn't to adjudicate — it's to understand both perspectives fully before anything else happens.

2

Early sessions — mapping the patterns

Most relationship problems have a structure. There's usually a pursuer and a withdrawer, or a pattern of escalation, or a particular topic that always explodes. Understanding your specific dynamic is what makes it possible to interrupt it — instead of just having better intentions and the same fights.

3

Ongoing — practising differently

Change in a relationship is slow, non-linear, and requires both people. Sessions are where you learn new ways to relate. What happens between sessions — the attempts, the slips, the small repairs — is where the actual change takes root. Most couples notice meaningful difference within 8–12 sessions, though this varies.

Explore further

Pricing

Sessions are 50 minutes. Couples sessions and individual sessions are the same rate.

Marriage Counselling with Ruchi Makkar

Single session — ₹2,000
Monthly package (4 sessions) — ₹7,000

Sliding scale fees available. If cost is a barrier, please say so — no one who genuinely needs support should be turned away.

Common questions

Is marriage counselling only for couples on the verge of divorce?

No — and in fact, the couples who come earliest tend to do best. Research by Dr. John Gottman's institute found that the average couple waits six years after problems begin before seeking help. Six years of built-up resentment and hardened patterns is much harder to work with than the same issues caught early. Marriage counselling is for any couple who feels stuck, disconnected, or like they're having the same argument without it ever resolving.

Will counselling push us toward divorce?

Ruchi's role isn't to preserve marriages at all costs or to end them — it's to help you both see what's happening clearly enough to make real choices. For some couples, that means finding their way back. For others, it means reaching a decision about separation with honesty and dignity rather than years of misery. She doesn't have an agenda about the outcome. She has an agenda about clarity.

My partner is reluctant to come. What do I do?

It's very common for one partner to be more willing. If your partner isn't ready for joint sessions, individual therapy can still be enormously useful. Understanding your own patterns and what you actually want from the relationship creates change that affects both people, even when only one is in the room. Sometimes that shift is enough to bring the other partner in later.

We've had an affair. Can counselling actually help?

Yes — though it's some of the hardest work couples do. Affair recovery requires both partners to be genuinely committed: the person who had the affair to understand and account for their choices, and the person who was betrayed to be fully heard before any pressure toward forgiveness. Ruchi has worked with couples through this. Not all of them stay together, but most reach a place of clarity and eventually something closer to peace.

Can we do marriage counselling online?

Yes. Ruchi works with couples online across India and internationally via secure video. Many couples find the convenience of online sessions actually makes it easier to be consistent — you're not negotiating two schedules plus a commute. For those in Gurgaon who prefer in-person, her clinic at DLF Phase 4 is available for joint sessions.

About the author
Ruchi Makkar is a psychotherapist based in DLF Phase 4, Gurgaon. She works with individuals, couples, and families — online across India and in-person in Gurugram — in Hindi and English. Book a session →

The right time to start was earlier. The next best time is now.

A first conversation costs nothing and commits you to nothing. Send Ruchi a WhatsApp message and she'll reply within a day.

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